Tuesday, November 13, 2007

The Continental Shelf

One of the biggest differences I've found about our apartment in Germany and our old apartment back home (besides of course the shower in the kitchen), is the idiocy of our German toilet. I hope you all don't mind, but I shall try my best to describe this phenomenon.

Like most toilets around the world, you would expect to poo right directly into the water at the bottom of the toilet bowl; however, many toilets here in Germany have a small porcelain shelf that catches the poo. Then when flushing (and hoping the water pressure is good enough and the poo not too hearty), the poo should just slide right off into the lower basin and disappear forever as it should.

This "lay and display" idea is monstrous to me. It just sits there on the top shelf and continues to stink up the bathroom the entire time as you try and finish as quickly as possible. Gone are the lovely days of crossword puzzles and PSP games while I passed through one of life's many pains in the asses... yes, the pun was intended. And I thought Germans were the best engineers...


brendan said...

maybe the inventor of their toilets was really proud of his own stool. or maybe upon taking advantage of the beer deals, and no listed alchohol content, they made it while doing the "one eye". oorrr potentially they had too many instances of the head going into the toilet after throwing up and realized that they needed a head rest or something to that nature.

Leann said...

Here's a tip for you on this one. If you know you're going to have an issue, put a few sheets of tp down first then do your thing. flush away with no worries and continue sitting until you finish the crossword.

Anonymous said...

German loos ace. Full stop. Who wants dirty old toilet water splashing their private parts after the big bad poop. Yuck. German toilets forever.

Anonymous said...

Use your brain, before you judge.

1) The continental shelf toilets are fantastic, since it is very important to check your stool daily and take care about it. Shitting is as important as eating.
2) US toilets use way more water than the other two types.
3) Any male human being should sit on all types of above toilets!

Think before you shit!

Anonymous said...

I believe Slavoj Zizek has a wonderful, yet sweaty and sniffy, analysis of toilets around the globe as per their national philosophy.

Now, if only he would analyze the Sitzpinkler debate! Ha!

Check it out!


ianandebe said...

Love the conversation a post on toilets could inspire. Every man has a right to his opinion and his toilet, but we will stick with the non-shelved if possible.

Thanks @eatingthepages for the toilet & philosophy video from Slavoj Zizek! Genius.

We're Back in Berlin Ja!

We're Back in Berlin Ja!
ebe & ian at Yak-toberfest 2008